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Published Dec 24, 2021

604: Put Your Best Foot Fetish Forward | Feedback Friday

Jordan Harbinger and Gabriel Mizrahi delve into the humorous and intricate social dynamics of life, from gift-giving disasters to quirky wedding traditions, roommate pet peeves, and the nuances of foot fetishes, offering insights on navigating miscommunications with humor and empathy.
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  • Fetish vs. Disorder

    and explore the distinction between harmless fetishes and disorders, using foot fetishes as an example. They emphasize that having a fetish doesn't equate to having a disorder unless it causes distress or impairs functioning 1. Jordan notes that many people experience guilt over their fetishes, but it's crucial to recognize that these feelings don't inherently make someone a predator 2. Gabriel suggests that understanding the origin of a fetish can be helpful, but not all fetishes stem from trauma 3.

    Sometimes you're just into what you're into. There's no need to pathologize it.

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    Acknowledging and accepting one's preferences is a vital step toward managing them healthily.

       

    Open Communication

    Open communication with partners about personal fetishes is crucial for reducing guilt and shame. Gabriel advises that sharing these desires with a partner can alleviate the burden of secrecy and potentially lead to mutual understanding 4. He suggests a candid conversation, acknowledging the difficulty but emphasizing the relief it can bring. Jordan shares an anecdote about a colleague with a foot fetish, illustrating how acceptance from a partner can lead to a thriving relationship 5.

    Working so hard to hide that part of yourself, it sounds pretty exhausting.

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    This openness can transform a source of distress into a shared experience.

       

    Therapy's Role

    Therapy can play a significant role in understanding and managing fetishes. Gabriel highlights that therapy might not "cure" a fetish but can help individuals come to terms with it and find safe ways to explore it 3. Jordan adds that accepting a fetish is crucial, as denying it won't make it disappear 6. He stresses that acceptance involves understanding that having a paraphilic desire is okay and not judging oneself too harshly.

    Accepting it means understanding that it's okay to have a paraphilic desire.

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    This acceptance can be the first step towards deciding how to integrate these desires into one's life without harm.

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