375: Bob Sutton | The A-hole Survival Guide

Negativity Spread

Negativity in social environments can spread like a virus, impacting stress levels and morale. Bob Sutton explains that proximity to toxic individuals increases the likelihood of adopting similar behaviors, as shown in a study where being near a toxic person raised the odds of becoming one 1. However, being close to constructive individuals can have the opposite effect, fostering cooperation and positivity. Sutton emphasizes the importance of choosing who you associate with, as it can significantly influence your behavior and mindset.

The river does not just flow towards the a-hole. It flows towards who you're around.

--- Bob Sutton

Jordan Harbinger highlights that dealing with difficult people can lead to decreased productivity and creativity, as well as increased errors and turnover 2.

   

Impact & Avoidance

Working with a-holes can have severe personal and professional consequences, including anxiety, depression, and career stagnation. Bob Sutton notes that exposure to abusive behavior can lead to health issues like heart disease and sleep problems, as well as deteriorating relationships with family and friends 3. He advises avoiding such environments when possible and suggests using socially constructive gossip to gather insights about potential workplaces.

If you have regular exposure to somebody who leaves you feeling demeaned, disrespected, and de-energized — that's how I would kind of define an a-hole — you're more prone to anxiety, depression.

--- Bob Sutton

Sutton also recommends doing small projects with potential employers to assess their work culture before committing long-term 4.